The Friendship Files: The List
by LanieSullivan
Summary: This is a companion tale to "The Choices We Make" which explores another aspect of the Lee/Francine friendship as a filler for "The Khrushchev List" and answers the question of where Lee got the idea to create the second list. Second tale in "The Friendship Files"


Disclaimer: "Scarecrow and Mrs. King" is copyrighted to Warner Brothers and Shoot the Moon Productions. The plot is mine, but not the characters. This story is meant for enjoyment purposes only. No infringement is intended.

Author's Note: So after writing "The Choices We Make" it occurred to me just how many opportunities there are throughout the series to explore the Lee/Francine friendship. This tale is a companion piece to that one for the episode "The Khrushchev List." If you haven't read that one, I'd recommend it first. This is going to be part of a series that I intend to call "The Friendship Files." I plan for it to be just about random episodes in no particular order as my muse strikes me. Special thanks to Khell for the help with some of the dialogue in this tale and for providing her insight into Francine's psyche since we all know that she's the Francine queen.

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Lee exited Billy's office, heaving a deep sigh, wondering just how the hell he was going to get back into his wife's good graces. He spotted Francine's empty desk, picked up the phone and dialed his home number to attempt to make peace. "Amanda, it's me. I wanna' say I'm sorry," He said contritely. "I was in a rotten mood when I made that list and I-" He halted as he realized that he was once again speaking to just the hum of the dial tone. "Damn it!' he swore, kicking at Francine's desk.

"Hey, what'd my desk ever do to you?" Francine quipped as she walked toward him. When Lee turned with a perturbed look on his face and slammed the receiver of the phone down, she nodded toward it and said, "Don't you have your own phone upstairs?"

"I-I-" He sighed. "Yours was closer," he answered with a shrug.

"What's got you in such a foul mood anyway?" Francine asked as she sat behind her desk, a look of concern on her face for her friend.

"It's nothing," Lee denied trying to cover up his confusion and hurt, sitting on the edge of her desk.

"Did you and Shirley Temple have a fight?"

Lee gave her a questioning gaze and answered, "Fight? No, no fight.'

"Uh-huh," Francine replied disbelievingly as she stared him down.

Under his friend's stern gaze, Lee relented. "You can't call it a fight when the other person won't talk to you."

Francine cringed. "Ouch. That bad, huh?"

"No, no," Lee denied again. "We'll...uh...we'll work it out." He then pasted on a smile and said in a lower voice for only her ears, "I mean, we're in love, right? That should count for something."

Francine laughed and argued, "Oh, boy, are you in trouble if you think that. If Amanda is giving you the silent treatment, that means BIG trouble with a capital T-R-O-U-B-L-E. Amanda's never silent. That means she's sitting around stewing and plotting the most inventive way to hide the body when she's done with you."

"Come on, Francine, I think I know Amanda just a little bit better than you do," Lee scoffed.

Francine just smiled sweetly and replied, "We'll see. What exactly did you do to get yourself in hot water with her?"

Lee shook his head and answered with another shrug, "Honestly, I don't know anymore. It started with tiny little things that were getting on my nerves and little things about me getting on hers..." He then outlined the whole sordid tale while Francine listened in silence. When he finished with the moment she walked up just as his wife was hanging up on him again, he looked at her worriedly when she was still silent. She let out a low whistle to which he snapped, "What?"

"Boy, are you an idiot," Francine stated bluntly.

"What?" Lee said his eyes widening.

"I'm amazed that with all you experience with women, you'd do something that asinine. That was just asking for trouble."

"But Billy just said that kind of thing is exactly what he does with Jeannie when they're butting heads. Are you saying that Billy who has been married for twenty-plus years is wrong?"

"You just put your finger on it right there," Francine responded. "They've been married a long time. You and Amanda have been married for what? Ten minutes?"

"Four months," Lee corrected with a glower at her. "I don't know. Billy sounded so sure of himself when he said it, but that was after I already pissed Amanda off with that list." He sighed, rose from his perch, raked both hands through his hair and continued as he paced, "You should have heard him going on and on about partnership being like a marriage."

Francine replied nonchalantly, "Oh, yeah, Billy knows too." When Lee gave her a befuddled look, she added, "Please, do you think we couldn't have figured it out when you two took off on vacation together, especially after Amanda was shot? That sheriff Waterhouse sent us the info on her shooting and in his report; he referred to her as your wife. It didn't take much from there."

"Huh," Lee replied as he stopped his pacing, not knowing what else to say.

"That and you morons left the homing device in the limo on and Fred tracked it. Of course, Fred being...well...Fred...he didn't figure it out..." She paused for a beat and then when it seemed Lee was still struck dumb, continued, "You know if you really wanted to keep it hush-hush, you should have turned that off. I'm surprised that Amanda didn't think of it. I get it from you, but we both know she's the real brains of your partnership."

"Hey!"

Undeterred by his interruption, Francine plunged on, "And you...well, let's face it...you're the brawn."

Lee shook his head and now that the fact that their marriage wasn't as secret as they thought had had time to sink in, asked, "So, why didn't you ever say anything?"

"Oh, Billy and I have a bet going on how long it'll take Fielder to catch on to it." She looked at her friend and asked him in concern, "So, let's talk about this list that's got you in the doghouse with your not-so-blushing bride already. What exactly did you put on it?"

Lee sighed and launched into an explanation, concluding with, "...the longer I wrote that list, the more irritated I got and all this dumb stuff that doesn't even matter ended up on it."

"So, in other words, you put everything on that list that makes Amanda...Amanda." When Lee just scowled at her, she said, "So, I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to once again save your ass. Maybe to make up for it, you should make a list of all of her good qualities.

Looking amused for the first time since this whole thing had started couldn't resist teasing his friend, "YOU think Amanda has good qualities?"

Francine looked sheepishly at him and replied, "Okay, so maybe she's grown on me...a bit," when Lee's grin widened, she added hastily, "But don't you dare tell her I said that!" She turned from him for a moment, dug into her desk drawer and pulled out a fresh legal pad. "Here," she handed it to him and nodded to Fred's desk across the way. "Get to work on that list."

"A list is what got me in trouble in the first place," Lee argued as he reluctantly took the pad from her hand. "I don't know how making another one is going to help."

Francine rose from her seat and gave him a shove toward Fred's desk with a stern, "Sit!"

Lee dropped into the chair and looked up at her helplessly. "I wouldn't even know where to start."

Francine glanced around to make sure that no one was listening. Thankfully, since this was a Sunday, the bullpen wasn't as bustling as it would be on a weekday. "Look, you just said it a minute ago. You're in love, right? Why don't you start with whatever it was that made you fall in love with her?"

"Like what? There are a lot of things abou-"

"God, you're hopeless!" Francine snapped. "How about that she's a good mother, the way she takes care of other people, "Francine began counting things off on her fingers, "...the way she knows how everyone around her takes their coffee, how she thinks on her feet, the way she drives Beaman nuts by outdoing everyone in class. That's entertaining all by itself. Or how about how she always seems to see things that other people don't?" She paused for a moment as she mentally counted. "There, that's six things already to start you off."

Lee chuckled and quipped, "Are you sure you're not in love with her too?"

"Ha-ha," she replied dryly as she socked him hard in the arm.

"Hey, lay off the left arm if you expect me to write this list," Lee countered, but still laughed at how easily Francine was able to come up with good things about his wife. He had to taunt her just a bit more. Putting on his best Sally Field imitation, he jibed, "You like her; you really like her."

"Shut up!" Francine sniped. "Look, I've got real work to do, so you get you on that list while I get back to it." She then flounced to her desk and flopped back down in her chair sending a death glare Lee's way as he continued to laugh. "Just remember, Buddy, I've been doing this a lot longer than Amanda has and I can come up with a lot more inventive ways to hide a body that she can."

"Duly noted," Lee said with a nod as he turned to the blank legal pad in front of him and tried to think of what to write. He smiled and mumbled to himself triumphantly, "I got it!" Once he began writing, he found that he couldn't stop. Every time that he thought he was done writing down things that he loved about his wife, he'd come up with another, his thoughts drowning out the hum of activity in the bullpen. He was still writing when he was startled by a hand on his shoulder. "What the hell?" he grumbled as he jumped.

"I just thought I'd check on you," Francine said. "You've been over here for an hour now."

"What?" He glanced at his watch and found that an hour had indeed passed since he'd begun. "Wow. I guess I got on a roll."

Francine nodded as she peered over his shoulder to peruse his handiwork, "So, what have you got?"

Lee closed the cover of the legal pad and answered, "What I've got here is between Amanda and me."

"Oh, is that how it's going to be now that I helped you?" Francine replied, her cool blue eyes flaring.

"Sorry, Francine, it's private," Lee stated firmly as he rose taking the tablet with him.

"Come on," Francine demanded as she tried to take it from him. "Let me see it!"

"No! It's private!" Lee held it behind his back to keep it away from her.

"Just a peek! Come on!" She tried to wrench it from his firm grasp, but he backed away and then held it over his head.

"I said no, damn it! Now, back off!"

"That is so not fair!" Francine pouted.

"Life's not fair, Francine," Lee fired back.

"Well, you better at least have made sure that that list..." she gestured toward the pad he still held tightly, "...is at least twice as long as the first one."

"Try more than three times as long. The first one was six pages. This one's twenty."

"Good," Francine said with a nod. Lee looked at her for a moment, an uncertain look on his face. He then glanced down at the legal pad. "What is it?"

He gestured to the list and asked, "What if this doesn't work?"

"Well, then you could always try the traditional wooing. You know, champagne, candlelight, flowers...Then there's my personal favorite... chocolates."

Lee smiled. "Maybe." He started to walk away and then turned back for just a moment to find her walking back toward her desk. "Francine?"

"Yeah?" she questioned, turning back to face him.

"Thanks." He beamed at her as he shifted the list in his hands.

Francine nodded. "Yeah, yeah, yeah." She gave him a shooing motion and said, "Now, go on. Go start groveling like the lovesick pup you are."

Lee's smile only widened as he walked out of the bullpen and tucked the precious list under his arm, immensely proud of it. Not even her ribbing could bring him down now that he had a solid plan in mind to get back into his wife's good graces.


End file.
